While India is going to Mars, what is the average and not so average Pakistani doing?

As the news channels flash “India goes to Mars”  , Pakistanis are bristling with the anxiety to match the feat. Due to an almost non existent space program, This time we cannot answer quid pro quo as we did in the case of the Nuclear Explosions but we still have our responses …

Dadi ammi (Grandmother): Yahodiyon ke sazish hai. (it’s a jewish conspiracy)

Ammi jee (mother) :  Mareekh per jana bhe koe eni  wade gal aeh..aewin paisey e zaya keetey (Going to Mars is not such a thing , wastage of money only)

Abba jee (Dad): Dafa kero!, South Afrika ka match lagao. ( let it go, South Africa versus Pakistan match is more important)

The “Yo” brother:  Mars , where is Mars? I asked you not to eat my MARS !

Twitter Pakistan: Trends #ThingsIndiaWillDoOnMars and coming up with as silly one liners as possible.

The Pakistani TV channels:  “Breaking News” India s Claim to reach MARS first exposed: “Ibn e Batota” was the first Muslim to reach MARS, Ancient sources reveal

The Maulana Politician: The qualities predicted of Hell matches exactly with MARS, Alhamdulillah , the infidels are going to hell themselves.

The “New Pakistan” Politician: We will not let them pass through our “space”.

The Liberal Politician: We extend our “aman ke aasha” to MARS.

The Pakistani right Wing Politician : We will eat grass but we will go to MARS.

The infamous Nuclear Scientist:  Where can I steal the MARS satellite blueprints to get back at all the morons.

The hotshot TV Analyst:  Karachi jal raha hai, Karachi jal raha hai aur Hindustan MARS per ja phoncha hai. Hum kab hosh mein aein gay. (Karachi is burning, Karachi is burning, and India has reached to MARS, when we will come to senses?)

The Military General: India ‘s mission to MARS is a threat to Pakistan’s security . We must enhance our Defence Budget to meet the Challenge.

The in famous Intelligence Agency:  Let’s plan another proxy war! In which nearest planet can we pitch the training camp?

The Film director:  We will take WAAR to the MARS.

Talibans: we don’t care as long as they don’t send us Drones from MARS